Hey all! So I just need some perspective from some other brides-to-be or have-been-brides on friendship drama with the wedding. I am the first of my friend group to get married and I think that plays into a lot of the drama. First some background: I got engaged on November, 17th of this year. When I announced my engagement all of my friends were so so excited for me! We set our date for August 3rd, 2019. I was so excited and naturally thought since everyone was excited for our engagement, they would be excited for the wedding.
My best friend (possible bridesmaid) found out and her first reaction was to ask why my wedding was on "top of her birthday" and she just kept asking why I couldn't "let her have her day?" IMPORTANT POINT: her birthday is August 12th. I tried explaining to her why we chose the date and she just said that i wasn't making anything better. I decided to give her space and then she texts me this week to ask why i hadn't reached out to her yet and she also said that if thats the date my FH and I want then "so be it," but when the time comes for her birthday she doesn't want to hear "a damn thing about our honeymoon or wedding." when she tried to apologize she said she would "ignore the fact that she was upset by this" to make my day better (this may sound crazy but i was upset by this comment especially because i don't want her to "ignore" that she was upset, i wanted her to be genuinely happy for me). Now we've tried talking through this but I'm still very hurt and she just wants to drop the whole thing.
I don't know how to ignore this and I know that it's possible I wasn't very sympathetic to her, but am I letting my bride-to-be brain get to me or am I justified in still being hurt? I don't know if i still want her to be a bridesmaid, but i know if i don't choose her as one then thats the nail in the coffin of our friendship. If anyone has something to share from the perspective of the friend that would help too.